Not getting what you what is a blessing in disguise. When we are very disappointed and let down, just like when we are falsely accused, our sense of self is right there in our face. When we are aggressively criticized our ego takes over. It is palpable and feels solid. This is the best stuff we could ask for. Emaho and amen brother and sister. For it is at these times we are given the precious opportunity to exam who we are, who we deeply are, because the object we must exam is right in our face! Rather than just be reactive fighting back or withdrawing beating ourself up, step back a half a step emotionally to gain some perspective on the situation. Exam what is in front of us. Ask yourself, “is this really me?” Or is this some habitual knee jerk reaction that I have been carrying around with me unexamined since I was a kid. Is this just a façade, a deceptive appearance? Is this nothing more than a fabrication, crafted into words and concepts by insecure emotions to “protect myself?” Have a genuine honest look. The more you look the fuzzier and unclear it becomes. Who am I deeply? This is hard to know in words. Maybe, just maybe, this is beyond words, into the vast realm of emptiness. Be careful though. Emptiness itself can be put to the same test. It too is beyond words, in the vast emptiness itself.
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